In A Room Full Of People...

Only one will be chosen to go on...and that is what I was told when my dad sat helpless in the chemo chair and I was asking about his odds.I never thought I would write about this but... I've been inspired to. Yesterday I was on myspace checking my messages and comments and wanted to check on a girl who lived on my floor in the dorms my freshmen year of college.We were friends grabbing lunch-dinner at the dining center. We lost touch and would run into one another through out the city always making plans to catch up but we never made the time. Years later when college was all said and done...we reconnected through myspace after making the grim discovery that both of our dads had the same cancer just different type. Her dad has small cell (rapidly grows) and my dad has non-small cell (slowly grows)both have their advantages and disadvantages. It was devestating to both of us and I found comfort in knowing I was not so alone. She to had the same type of relationship with her father as I did so she felt my pain and we supported one another and offered prayer and positive thoughts. Then our communication came to a hault and I had no idea why but I just figured that she was busy with family and work, as so was I. But then yesterday as I was checking up on her I made the grave discovery that her father died.A man I only knew through pictures... But in those pictures I saw a great man,father and husband. I tried to hold back the tears my own father was just in the other room and I didn't want him to see me upset.I then became bitter and blessed all at once (and yes that is possible)Bitter that cancer has taken another life but blessed that my own father is thriving and doing amazing up against a fatal disease.The doctor only gave my dad months to live and its been over 2 years. My father has no idea but his cancer taught me a lot of things...and out of the lessons I learned the most important one is to cherish every second of life because it is truly a gift.I hate how they only call those who survive the disease survivors. I believe although her father has passed away that he is a survivor he endured a lot of pain and he fought to be here for as long as he could. Every cancer patient whether they are here with us or not in my eyes is a survivor.«F.S.» rest in peace in the arms of the Lord.

Dress Anxiety

So... The dress I just ordered from Nordstrom for the summer wedding is not going to work out! My bf's mom finally spilled the beans and gave me some direction on what I should wear since I'll be at the family table.The request is simple long,flowy and colorful. But for my body type and my height dresses like that are hard to come by without altering them. This is going to be a lot more complicated then I thought. But I'm glad she gave me some insight on what to wear because I didn't have a clue! So the mission is on...long,flowy,colorful dress or bust!

Rise and Shine!

It is Wednesday morning and I woke up at 5:30 am and I can't go back to sleep!But I honestly didn't mind laying around in silence watching the sun come up.Most of the time our lives are so busy we forget to take a second and enjoy the simple silence. I had a teacher in high school that did an experiment he asked all of us to take the first hour of the day and to appreciate silence and that I did it was hard at first not to listen to the tv or radio while getting ready but it allowed me to clear my head and not feel so stressed about what lies ahead. So I have taken the advice to heart and every morning I take a bit of "ME" time and lay in bed with my eyes shut and take in the beauty of silence.

A Dress For a Summer Wedding

I have ZERO time to look for a dress to wear to my boyfriend's older sister's wedding in July so I decided to do the internet route... and I'm glad that I did! Although the family loves me and they totally see me with their son, I'm still just the girlfriend. The title is great but not at a wedding where that title leads to the question "Are you two serious?" and they look at you and wonder if you'll be around the next time there is a reason for everyone that is important in my boyfriend's life gathers. So I was on a mission to find a dress that would be appropriate for the occasion and it's a thin line... I don't want to be to formal because I don't want people to think why is this girl so dressed up she is not even a family member and I don't want to be to casual because I need to make a lasting AMAZING impression. So I decided on this orange number that will look great on my skin and the cut will be good for my body type. I also can't resist the detail and pleating that makes the dress a statement.

The Climb

My song of the moment by Miley Cyrus...the lyrics speaks volumes to what I'm going through...

I can almost see it That dream I'm dreaming but There's a voice inside my head sayin, You'll never reach it, Every step I'm taking, Every move I make feels Lost with no direction My faith is shaking but I Got to keep trying Got to keep my head held high There's always going to be another mountain I'm always going to want to make it move Always going to be an uphill battle, Sometimes I'm gonna to have to lose, Ain't about how fast I get there, Ain't about what's waiting on the other side It's the climbThe struggles I'm facing,The chances I'm taking Sometimes might knock me down but No I'm not breakingI may not know itBut these are the moments thatI'm going to remember most yeahJust got to keep goingAnd I, I got to be strong Just keep pushing on, cause There's always going to be another mountain I'm always going to want to make it move Always going to be an uphill battle, Sometimes I'm gonna to have to lose, Ain't about how fast I get there, Ain't about what's waiting on the other sideIt's the climb There's always going to be another mountainI'm always going to want to make it moveAlways going to be an uphill battle,Sometimes you going to have to lose,Ain't about how fast I get there,Ain't about what's waiting on the other sideIt's the climb Keep on movingKeep climbingKeep the faith babyIt's all aboutIt's all aboutThe climbKeep the faithKeep your faith.

He/She? San Francisco Surprise

My short weekend in San Francisco was amazing! My boyfriend's 26th birthday went off without a hitch and he LOVED AsiaSf!!! Everyone that came along to celebrate had such a blast and couldn't stop talking about it. I also got to wear my giant flower headband and got many compliments from the male illusionists at the restaurant and from my love (bf). I was just so happy that I could surprise my him and do something for someone that loves me more then I could ever love myself. He said it was the best birthday ever! We spent two days walking around and just "being" and it was so nice.

I heart flowers in the hair!

I'm so excited for my upcoming trip to the city! We will be celebrating the boyfriend's 26th birthday. I've made dinner reservations at ASIASF and let's just say that everyone will be in for a huge surprise! For the big event I picked up a really fun big (HUGE) flower hair piece. I know... I know... I'm 25 but I thought that it would be perfect for the occasion! So I'm just wearing a little black dress with a huge pink flower hair head band. It's a little outrageous but we are going to a restaurant that prides themselves on male illusionist. It looks like the one that Kirsten Dunst is wearing but PINK! Dressing professional five out of seven days a week and feeling like I'm 50 in my suits make me want to cut lose and dress like myself on my days off! Watch out San Francisco...with my HUGE pink flower...here I come!